is there anything more depressing than unpacking condoms from your suitcase that you thought you were going to use on vacation?
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
Fun holiday story for you: Alex and I went out drinking. She left. I needed a ride home. Met this dude and told him to drive my car back. Once at my house, I made him take out my dog and then apologized for not wanting to make out with him. I said, let me go see if my roommate is interested and then I slept in Alex's bed all night.
20 bucks says he was an actual leprechaun
Some old bald man is a 100,000 dollar Audi sports car just revved his engine at me and held out his phone at me trying to get my number. I hate the valley.
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
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