My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
he just invited me over for the 3 p's...pepsi pizza and porn...I'm gonna marry him
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
Shitty. Well if it makes you feel any better I just had a toothless wasted crackhead in my bar who was mad because there are TOO MANY FUCKIN TREES in Nantucket.
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
I'm naked, eating straight Nutella, and listening to "Make you feel my love" on repeat. So no. He didn't ask me out.
Randomize
