You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
Ughh I think I'll just sit here in the dark and wallow in self-pity while drinking wine and knitting scarves for my future cats.
Okay, this next statement may sound like a red flag but I'm tellin you, shotgunning those two beers really helped me love my child more effectively. Honest.
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
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