MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
3 things I learned last night: 1.) I'm not as light as I used to be. 2.) Sex on the roof of a convertible is a really bad idea. 3.) The hospital now has super glue pens for sealing minor cuts instead of stitches!
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
Do you not realize that being Batman fulfills about 95% of my non-sexual fantasies?
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
Randomize
