My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
Sitting at a bar next to a guy wearing sunglasses drinking a pitcher by himself and having an argument with himself over if journey is more ballin than kiss. Feel better about myself.
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
I tried to bring you in when you passed out on the porch but all you said was that I "ruined your hope ands dreams of becoming an astronaut"
Gave his drunk ass water, & he poured it on my shirt while saying "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!" When reminded of it today he replied with, "at least you came in first place"
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
I've been trying to fall asleep with ice packs covering my vagina for the last hour... Sorry for being vulgar. I'm going to kill myself.
We told him to puke in the Denny's parking lot or we wouldn't be his friend anymore. So he did. He wasn't even drunk.
Randomize
