What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
Am I texting you while being used as a stripper pole by two half-naked women? hint: I am.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
your house isnt even gonna be on google maps after this party
Look, all I'm saying is that you're going to be a great Vodka Mom.
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
Randomize
