What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
So I'm pretty sure I fucked the dept of homeland security guy on my kitchen table. No recollection of it, but there are signs.
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
She vajazzled her vag. It was as useless as putting earrings on chewbacca
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened
Pinterest knows I’m getting divorced
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