We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
I sent him this really overly apologetic text asking him out. It was just sad. Not even 27 shots of whiskey can grow me a self-esteem.
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
Drunk purchased a negligee, plan b, keds and Himalayan salt shot glasses.. there’s only one reasonable purchase there, and we both know it’s not the sneakers
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
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