used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
Okay so if I'm going to keep referring to my hangover in the third person it needs a name.
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
Broken heels while double fisting margaritas, picking up shirtless, bloody men and escorting them out of harms way, the meltdown when I realized I can go without a bra bc my boobs shrunk, the morning vodka red bull you were forced to drink? Which one roped you in?
I'm just going to use my debit card. I feel bad buying pizza with the money I stole from my roommate...so I'm going to put it in my piggy bank.
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