If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
how convenient is it that the kid i'm fucking lives right next to planned parenthood?
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
She called his dick the colossus. I dont give a fuck if shes his wingman, I gotta see this natural wonder
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
Nearly got hit by a blue bell ice cream truck. Can I count on you to make plenty of puns like "her life was sweet, and so was her death" at my funeral if that was to happen?
We were in his kitchen and she turned to me with a straight face and an avocado in her hand and said "Can we steal this?"
he spent an hour trying to rescue a bug from the sink. turned out to be a sesame seed.
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
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