The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
If I would have known that wiping my dick on her pillow would have caused her to leave........
this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
Do you think there is vodka in heaven?
you let me eat a milky way from your vagina. G is not lettin you hang out for eternity
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
all time personal low: room service guy going "You want french fries AND onion rings???"
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
They invented a new game at work. Its called guess if I'm baked, hungover, drunk, or some combination of the three. Its surprisingly very difficult..
That awful moment when there is no more beer and you find yourself considering tequila and aloe juice.
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
How many fucks given?
0.12846
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
Randomize
