My grandmass entire neighborhood is over for dessert and i'm high as fuck...about to make a couple of freshman boys real uncomfortable
Freshman in high school? Just your type
Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
Sometimes, when I pour the powdered creamer in my coffee I like to pretend it's Colombian grade cocaine.
That's the kind of morning coffee a girl could welcome the day with.
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
Randomize