Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
I'm at some bar in brklyn... just made out with a guy named Owen.
He is a pre-school teacher... just sang me a song about weather.
It was like the Ritz Carlton of jails. I got introduced to our criminal system the right way.
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
It doesn't matter if I tell the story beginning to end or end to beginning, the story still starts with a random girl blowing me in the bathroom.
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
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