I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
He came up behind me making dolphin noises in my ear when I noticed a collection of hors d'ouevres from the reception earlier in his jacket pocket
I will never doubt you again...he IS perfect for you
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
Randomize
