I love black thongs
Just FYI I rubbed poison oak on all your sheets and blankets so we all will know who you hooked up with (in about a day)
Can you please check on Jay? He just called and left a Backstreet Boys song on my voicemail. Either it's 1998, or someone needs to go back to rehab.
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
She just kept introducing me to people by telling them which of their friends I've fucked
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
WHO JUST REMOVED THAT SAME BOARD IN TWO MINUTES FLAT WITH NO INJURIES, SHOES, SOCKS, OR BRA?! THIS BITCH. CRACKIN A BEER FOR DA SHOWA. BITCHES AIN'T SHIT MOTHAFUCKA
He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"...
The low-flow toilet at my office cannot handle the intensity of this hangover.
Just showed my drunk fiancé where I got circumcised, she's been crying for twenty minutes.
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
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