but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
Just threw up my room service breakfast with my fake eyelashes and pearls still on.
he asked me to put his condom on because he couldn't see without his glasses
He bought me flowers. The card with it said: Sorry I cant get you off. I will try harder.
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
I thought my broken hand would put a damper on Halloween, but fake costume eyelashes and hydrocodone are kinda fun at the same time.
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
i think if a sober person was watching us they would have not thought we were witty
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
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