But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
My boss just called me into his office to apologize for being an "inadvertant cockblock"
i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
Piecing together the sordid story from witness accounts and photographic evidence, courtesy of Fcebook. My night included Mojitos, lighting the bar on fire and declaring myself the Queen of Nerds when I stole someone's flashing tiara. Woke up this morning with a velvet cape and plastic scepter to match. Mojitos are awesome!
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
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