Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
All right well I’m making her sugar cookies and sleeping with her husband tonight. Just another manic Monday
Randomize
