By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
Just woke up with my keys in one hand and cheesecake in the other.
I think I'm done drinking. How did we end up partying at a frat house with my mom...
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
Sometimes self-care is taking a shot of vodka and moving on.
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
Randomize
