bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
No it's ok I've been talking to the girl at the Chinese restaurant about your dick for the last 20 minutes. I haven't mentioned your name but she thinks she knows you.
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
Went home last night with a guy in a tutu, didn't know he was wearing a tutu until he threw it at me in the bedroom. God I love Halloween.
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
Look I'm really high right now, and if I were to leave this house, it would be for the sole purpose of getting an ice cream sandwich. So can you please just do it.
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
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