So drunk its hurt
Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
Ugh. I'm going to die alone, sister. Half-eaten by one of my thirty-seven cats and clutching a martini shaker
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
Randomize
