Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
Come share oat with me in your robe
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
Just remembered sticking my head out the window as i drove us to walmart and yelling that i was a golden retriever.
Also, sorry for verbally assaulting you when you asked if you could dump the bowl.
Can I come kidnap you from work so we can chug mimosas? My little brother has a ski mask I can borrow.
Randomize
