Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
No he exists. Who else tells me no matter how drunk I am to pull out. He's watching over me so my bastard doesn't get created.
My feet surprised me
For one week of my life every time I pull my cock out I want the Jurassic Park theme music to start playing.
How was I supposed to know the accent was fake before i slept with him
Randomize
