I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
Need toilet paper. Napkins suck. Slowly running out of those two and the bleeding hasn't stopped. Your cat is next
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
We left Waffle House and he took off running five miles down the road saying we were "training for the Olympics." And I mean, I couldn't leave him out there like that...
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
Randomize
