I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
Our phone convo was getting intense. Then I heard her say "quiet mommy is trying to have phone sex"
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
Listen, if I miss the flight to Vegas because she's still rimming my ass, it will have been worth it.
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
Randomize