Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
On blowjobs: "If you decide to go there, you finish the job. No complaining." I don't care if it sounds like she's talking about Iraq, I'm in love.
I swear if his heart was half the size of the cum stains he's left on my sheets we would have the perfect relationship
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
Found a Safeway Deli Sandwich in the shower this morning... Perhaps the 9th beer was unnecessary.
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
I was giving a campus tour, when a drunk senior came up behind me and shouted at the group, "If Jesus ain't your homeboy - get the fuck off this campus!" Looks like his religion course is paying off...
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize
