Freshman orientation day on campus. Dear diary, JACKPOT.
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
So, your gf couldn't walk up the stairs without your help, but she could knit you a scarf?
I think the fact that the scarf was made out of dental floss should be taken into account.
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize
