dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
people are starting to question the shark bite story
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
I consider myself an expert at getting drunk and embarrassing people at weddings.
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
this whole "benign brain tumor" is truly a blessing in disguise. I almost want to start bringing MRIs to the bar because sympathy pussy is flowing like the nile
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
she was all excited about us being eskimo sisters and then i was just like "alyssa i've literally been inside of you" and she got even more excited
Randomize
