dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST
I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise!
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
Remember when we used to share painkillers at parties? Now we're dealing in blood pressure pills. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
it says 'tasty bitch' in sharpie on my tits...
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
Randomize