He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
Reason #3 women are better than men: texting and peeing simultaneously. Write THAT in the fucking snow.
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
It is. We should just be drunk all the time forever everything is like just 90% more perfect
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
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