I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
when you close your eyes do you see, that mystical creature will be me.
who is this?
Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
I just look @ having a child spit on you as another form of birth control. I think my ovaries just tied themselves in a knot.
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
I've counted 3,503 loops of fabric on my carpet so far. FUCK YOU ACID!!!
He called me skinny, I broke his garbage disposal, then denied him sex. Normal second date etiquette.
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
Life update: This fucking MacBook repair guy called me over last night for a booty call and he didn’t have a condom OR a bed
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
Randomize
