Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
It was like god placed me in his bed and said," here's your shot girl. Don't mess this up." And I looked at god and laughed in his face.
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
I used his number to look up his customer information at work. He's no longer saved as Magic Penis in my phone.
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
I'm taking pictures of my asshole to send to my boss. This is not what I had in mind the day after thanksgiving.
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
Randomize
