But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
I walked up to a girl in a bar, and all I was capable of doing was taking my beer and bumping it up to hers. While doing so, all I could say was "Bud Light". She walked away.
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
At least you have booty calls.
True. I just waste them though. I feel like I need to be told "there are people in this world who would give anything for just one and you have two." You know in that same tone your parents told you about the starving people in china
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
You stole my car to go to your boyfriends. Now your parents are fucking in the next room at top volume, and I have no way to escape..thought you should know that the amount of therapy I'll be needing for this is expensive.
You're the best friend ever.
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