3:47a: I take it you're not on your way over
so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
Selling drugs in raindeer antlers is the best way to spread christmas cheer
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
Randomize