My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
I know it was you because you're the only person I know who gets drunk and craves soup.
Soup is delicious
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
Hey I have your shoes. Do you remember shouting "Police brutality!" when the bouncer was kicking you out last night?
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
i think the title to my autobiography shall be, "a bottle of vodka and various pieces of meat"
and this is why you're my favorite gay friend.
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
Randomize
