some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
I kinda knew it wasnt going to pan out when he would rather watch how i met your mother ON TIVO than fuck me......
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
just bought 2000 rhinestones and a heart shaped stencil at Micheals...I think the cashier knows i'm Vajazzling
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
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