I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
This guy in church just had a prayer request to help him get through his hangover. He is my new hero.
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
Some old chick is rubbing my thigh and saying she needs some Memorial Day dick. Her teeth are kind of gross but I'm going for it.
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
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