well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
It was around the time I started requesting "big girl straws" from the bartender for my jack and diets, that I knew I'd probably wake up with my sunglasses on and find my wallet in the shower.
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs."
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
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