Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
i'm sorry i gave your brother a handjob while you were on the blanket next to us, but to be fair your back was turned.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
You overflowed the toilet cuz you tried to flush apples. you said they were singing too loudly
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
For every drunk face picture you send me, I'm gonna send a wholesome family photo.
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
Never underestimate the power of titties
Randomize
