best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
Spotted: forty year old in red dress, cigarette in hand, squatting to pee by railroad tracks. Hello future.
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
you can't tell me you didn't shit your pants I saw them in the trash can by the bathroom.
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
I need water and some morals
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
Shit day. Some kids decided to open my car at 3 AM while I was at work and the alarm went off. I went after them with a sword but they were minors so I didn't kill them.
then he said the sex was mediocre and that it was because of me. and that we could try again tomorrow.
it was 100% mediocre because of him, and we will 100% not be trying again tomorrow.
Randomize
