So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
I feel like my lungs want to punch me in the vagina.
is that even a sentence?
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
this hospital has no fireball
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
You were so drunk Last night you asked for your glasses so you could read the directions on a band aid
Randomize
