I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
Voted patient of the month again at the urgent care. I need to rethink my life choices.
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
Randomize