i just jacked off to lindsey vonn, i feel so patriotic
USA! USA! USA!
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
I haven't shaved in at least a week, he said "obviously neither one of us was prepared for this"
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
Randomize
