i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
Do you ever wake up and realize playing beer pong with your parents wasnt a dream? Your mom really beat you
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
Randomize
