goodnight i made you a song goodbye
so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
If I had to summarise my weekend I would do so using the words "horrifying romanian moonshine"
Opened my purse to realize I have someone else's birth certificate. What happens to me in college?
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
Just got the test results back; apparently I'm red-green colorblind. this explains the past 18 years of my life and i'm wondering why i didn't realize this sooner
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
Randomize
