Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
Ok fuckface listen up and listen good. 1.calling dibs on a chick out of your league is like applying for a job with a highlight video 2. dont fucking ski down the stairs again 3. if you do, put it on your highlight video
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
Dude I'm driving around California right now hiding little bags of weed in random places like Easter eggs so that I can come back and find them later
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
I like how I just yelled in the window at Mcdonalds drive thru, got his number and then fucked. it was like I ordered a happy meal that only can be had after midnight.
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
sorry i got drunk at sunday brunch and force fed carrot sticks to your cat
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