Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
There's a naked man in my car right now.
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
My uterus feels like it went 8 rounds with Mike Tyson. And that was only a quickie.
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
I couldn't find any flowers so I brought her a cat.
I lost my wallet so I paid for my cab ride home with a sausage sandwich I found in my purse. Must have thought it was my wallet.
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
This is a crisis. I had a huge crush on him in seventh grade and now his girlfriend is due to have his child on my birthday. HIS CHILD CAN'T BE BORN ON MY BIRTHDAY.
Randomize
