Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
I got tired of walking to the bathroom that I decided to throw up in a cup. I now have 3 cups full of vomit on top of my mini fridge
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
i knew you were okay when you wanted to eat in the ambulance
There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
Jared is "trying to bite a strangers hat off" drunk. Oh, and that stranger is a girl at a table of 5 guys, one girl.
How could you not respond to a text containing the words "goat man" ?!?
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
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