Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
i celebrated the independence of our country by dry heaving tequila all morning. so classy. happy 4th.
Instead of asking if I had a condom she literally said " I'm not on the pill but I'm pro choice... your move"... I'm in love
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
Sitting at a bar next to a guy wearing sunglasses drinking a pitcher by himself and having an argument with himself over if journey is more ballin than kiss. Feel better about myself.
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
Can you please explain to me why there are 7 bags of tacos in my bed?
Your drunk naked friend is roaming the living room. Started roaming my room. Please come retrieve him
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
Literally just took 6 shots in the shower..I’ve got this.
Randomize
