I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
My 16 year old neighbor is throwing a rager cuz her parents are out of town and my brother and I are sitting on the porch listening to A) someone fuck on the trampoline B) a girl bawling about her parents finding out C) someone puking in what we think is the hot tub. And overall we take a shot everytime someone says "bra"
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
Don't be too mad at the guy who broke your kitchen table. Didn't get his name, but he knew all about your gay porn career. Like DETAILS...
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
I asked him if we could switch positions so I could watch the Olympics... I'd say date number two is a miss
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
Randomize
