I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
who knew that if you vomit while skydiving the puke goes up towards the people that are behind you.
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
I'm eating cheerios out of the palm of my hand while I pee with the door open. Is this adulthood?
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
I'm way too hungover for life right now
I appreciate the I'll come bail you out of jail tone in the text
She got up, grabbed me a box of gushers told me to start eating, and immediately gave me the best head I've ever gotten.
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
Randomize
