Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
Chef at hibachi place learned it was my bday and sprayed 20 second count worth of saki in my mouth. Not sure it was the right image to share with my kids, but thought you'd be proud.
His voice is like having sex with hot chocolate and then suddenly you're pregnant.
EX BOYFRIEND'S TWINS WERE BORN TODAY. THIS CALLS FOR A MARG.
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
Randomize
