I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
Randomize
